Seeing a loved one suffer is never easy, no matter what they are going through. Whether it be financial struggles, mental health problems, conditions like chronic pain or cancer, or anything else we want to support them and do what we can to make their lives that little bit more comfortable.
Addiction is a cruel beast and one of the most difficult and desperate things you can see your partner go through. Alcohol addiction is a bigger issue than ever before with an estimated 400 million people worldwide living with alcohol use disorders.
And it’s a condition where partners really do need support. But how do you do that exactly? Well, there are ways you can be there from the alcohol detoxification process right through to therapy, coping mechanisms and helping them during the more difficult times in recovery.
If you have a loved one living with alcohol addiction, here are a few tips on how you can support them…
Start with Education
Firstly, you want to get a firm grasp of the condition yourself. You need to understand the complexities of alcohol addiction and the impact it can have on your loved one. It’s not just a case of willpower when it comes to developing a condition or addressing it, it’s far more than that.
You should learn about the psychological cravings, emotional issues that can drive addiction, as well as the process of getting help too, allowing you to not only better appreciate what your partner is experiencing, but also be more empathetic and better informed when it comes to the help available.
Encourage Professional Help
From your research you’ll undoubtedly find that professional help is the best step forward to get the most impactful help. Recovery can be succesful in isolation and without it, but it’s much harder and much rarer, with professional guidance putting loved ones on the right pathways and supplying the right tools for recovery.
You’ll find speaking to doctors, counsellors and therapists will provide structure and expertise that’s needed for long-term recovery, while they will be much more likely to get to the root of any underlying trauma or mental health problems that could be contributing towards addiction.
Be Patient with the Process
From a support perspective, patience is key. It’s perhaps the number one trait you need. Recovery is rarely a straight line. It can have its peaks and troughs and there will be setbacks or slow progress along the way. This doesn’t mean failure.
It’s all part of the journey and your help along the way can help recovery plans be adjusted, while your encouragement is key. It will help them keep the faith, even during more difficult moments and keep them on the right pathway, even if progress on it isn’t quite what you might expect.
Create a Supportive Environment
Support is so, so crucial in recovery and the environment you create at home can go a long way in showcasing that. Simple steps like removing any alcohol from the house or avoiding boozy social occasions can be a good start.
Meanwhile, you might want to encourage new activities that don’t involve alcohol, from getting out and exercising to activities like cooking, art or even things like photography and doing jigsaws together. Essentially, spending time together, having something to concentrate on and being able to connect without alcohol.
What’s more, encouraging a regular sleeping routine, balanced nutrition and relaxation time can all help promote and stabalise recovery.
Communicate Openly and Honestly
Addiction can be really damaging to relationships, but treatment and recovery does provide the opportunity to rebuild the relationship, with honesty and open communication vital to that.
Encourage your partner to discuss their troubles, and listen without judgement. At the same time, you should be honest and open about your needs too. Recovery while in a relationship or when close to a loved one is a shared journey and you need to be heard and supported as well as your loved one.
Setting boundaries can be an important step in this, highlighting consequences if they do return to drinking or old ways, all while showing you will be there to help them get back on track.
Look After Yourself
Supporting someone in recovery can be emotionally draining. Many partners fall into the trap of focusing entirely on their loved one while neglecting their own health. It is important to maintain your own social connections, pursue your own interests, and, if necessary, seek counselling for yourself.
Support groups such as Al-Anon, which are specifically designed for families of those with alcohol problems, can provide valuable understanding and reassurance. By staying strong and balanced, you are better able to support your partner effectively.
Celebrate Progress
Finally, celebrate the wins too. Across the entire journey you should take the positives and really celebrate these. Make the most of checking off milestones, no matter how small they are. It will keep the process positive, your loved one motivated, and reinforce that commitment to sobriety.
That might come from a week sober, a year, or moments within new hobbies, doing things independently for the first time. Create a list of milestones to tick off and make sure you and your loved one get the recognitition that’s deserved.
